I had dreams about him last night. Though I can only remember one of them. We were on some kind of Vespa, and he was going too fast and we crashed.

He didn’t look hurt, or bad, or anything. He just left. And in the dream I ran through what looked like an huge apartment complex, knocking on every door and calling his name, over and over. No one opened any of the doors.

That’s all I remember. I had another dream but I don’t remember any of it fortunately.

I remember how I woke up each time. Gasping for breath, choking on tears, sobbing, and feeling like I couldn’t breathe.

This is how I am because he’s gone. Because he chooses to be gone.

And I just want it to stop.

Stop brain, he’s gone. If he cared he’d be back. But he doesn’t so he won’t.

But my brain continues dreaming.

About masterpieceofadisaster

Alias: Kuckoo Savant
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4 Responses to Dreaming

  1. I think your dream is a reflection of your thoughts: the time in Missouri was a fun ride, but it just sort of stopped. He wasn’t hurt or injured – he just walked away. You keep hoping to be friends again, but he’s not accessible. Since this is a reflection of your thoughts, you need to take control of your thoughts and train yourself to think of something else. Just an opinion from someone who loves you.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. jade says:

    I think what’s most interesting about the dream is that neither you nor he seemed concerned about whether you were injured after the crash — all concern was over how he was feeling.

    Amazing writing. I’d love to read something from you every day.

    Liked by 1 person

    • masterpieceofadisaster says:

      I never thought about it that way before! thank you for that insight, and the compliment. I try to post as often as possible, I’d love you to read every time I post!


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